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Mama, step away from the camera December 31, 2007

Posted by emsgeiss in Humor & Satire, parenting & family, toddlers, writing/editing/blogging.
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Between digital cameras and cell phones, as parents today, we have opportunities for hysterically funny candids of our kids that our parents never had.  Sure there were Instamatics, back then, but that’s not quite the same thing as capturing your child in mid-whatever at a moment’s notice.  (Plus, carrying an Instamatic and its film around is a little less convenient than flipping open your Razr.) My husband and I (and countless other parents) easily have thousands of pictures that truly capture our kids being themselves. 

Today, however, I reached a new low in candid-mama-cam. 

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Pushing Forty December 31, 2007

Posted by emsgeiss in Humor & Satire, Uncategorized, writing/editing/blogging.
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We celebrated my husband’s 38th birthday the other night. He and one of our dear friends share the same birthday, so every year, our  little group of friends always gets together for a joint birthday party of sorts.  We secured our sitter earlier in the month, and were smart enough to secure her for New Year’s Eve (tonight) as well.  He is now officially in his “late 30s,” as he likes to call it with 40, lurking just around the bend. What’s funny is that we met almost 20 years ago in college, and at a time when 40 seemed a lifetime away, when 40 wasn’t even on our minds—it seemed old; the potential onslaught of …*gasp*… 30 was near enough. Thirty came and went with little drama, and forty doesn’t seem like it will seem to bad either. (Catch me in ten months though, when I join him in the late 30s and I might have another story though, for now, I can relish in still being in my mid-thirties and stick my tongue out at my elder.) 

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The journey of building a magazine December 31, 2007

Posted by emsgeiss in Business Issues, Green & Frunchy, networking, parenting & family, WAHM/WAHD Stuff, writing/editing/blogging.
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A lot of my regular readers and close friends and associates know that I’m launching a magazine in January—theWAHMmagzine: the only content-driven digital magazine for work-at-home parents. It has been exciting and a challenge, and with five days to go until the big launch, I’m getting beside myself with excitement about it, so I thought that I’d write about the journey.

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On the third day of Christmas… December 27, 2007

Posted by emsgeiss in Humor & Satire, parenting & family, Uncategorized.
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…I wrote a Christmas meme. 

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Since Christmas is technically 12 days long, today being the third day of Christmas, instead of imparting three French hens to my dearly loved readers, instead I have saved my Christmas meme for today.  Boddie at Finding Boddie tagged all of us over at Absolute Write, so here I go. From what I understand the rules of the original meme includes tagging seven others, but in the spirit of sharing and giving at Christmastime, I too will leave this meme open ended. (more…)

So this is what’s meant by “No Child Left Behind.” December 22, 2007

Posted by emsgeiss in education, Humor & Satire, parenting & family, politics, writing/editing/blogging.
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Yesterday, I had to do a few quick errands, which meant driving straight into the Lion’s Den, also known as the one-mile square radius of the major shopping mall in our city.  My usual route to that neck of the woods was backed up, so I took a detour, which led me down the street where one of our city’s two high schools is.  Driving along, passing some kids with backpacks and others curiously without any, I noticed the school’s street-side marquis.

It read, and I kid you not, “Holiday Recess. 12-22-07 Thru 1-7-08.”  Certainly my eyes were deceiving me. I must have been distracted by Viggo Mortgensen’s voice on NPR as he discussed his most-recent film.  Certainly a schoolhad not spelled “through” as “T-H-R-U” on its marquis, and especially not the school that is literally walking distance from the Board of Education.  I wished for one brief second that my cell had been close enough and that I’d been stopped in traffic in front of the marquis, so that I could snap a picture. It was fodder for a blog post. (more…)

Some Assembly Required… December 20, 2007

Posted by emsgeiss in Humor & Satire, parenting & family, Uncategorized.
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This three-word phrase is one that instills in parents greater fear than a root canal. It is also a phrase that connotes a parental rite of passage, when the night before Christmas, after the wee ones are tucked in their beds envisioning sugar plums with one ear open for the sounds of hooves upon the roof, mom and dad are trying to quietly find the tiny screws (and a screwdriver with a small-enough nib), correctly sized batteries while reading pictogram directions that make no sense in any language. (more…)

O Tannenbaum! O Tannenbaum! December 20, 2007

Posted by emsgeiss in Humor & Satire, parenting & family.
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Our Tannenbaum (and deutchofiles will appreciate the capitalization) is not exactly a fir tree…more like a faux-fir. My husband and I grew up with the aroma of balsam in the air at Christmastime and our first two years of marriage, we went on the annual tree hunt, that quest for the perfect tree, with limbs that would fall to just the right height, be nice and full, with no bald spots, and broad enough to cast a lovely bonnet over the presents that would come to lie beneath it. Last year, our first Christmas as parents with a newly toddling 10-month-old along with new-parent fears of spontaneous tree combustion, and the potential for fallen pine needles to become a toddler delicacy, we decided to go for an artificial tree. (more…)

T-minus five days and counting… December 19, 2007

Posted by emsgeiss in parenting & family, Uncategorized.
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It just dawned on me—well a few hours ago anyway—that Christmas is in five days, not including today of course. That means, only a couple of days left to ship packages via Priority or Express mail to ensure Christmas Eve delivery at the very latest.  For those who may be wondering, how on earth Christmas managed to sneak up on me despite the fact that Christmas products have been on store shelves since Halloween ended and some stations have been playing Christmas music 24/7 since Thanksgiving, and lest we not forget the neighborhood Christmas displays that have been sprouting up since Thanksgiving like so many mushrooms after a week of rain.  (more…)

Networking: blog blitz #5 — can you feel the love? December 15, 2007

Posted by emsgeiss in networking, writing/editing/blogging.
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In earlier posts, I’ve discussed how the Internet is the water cooler for those of us who work from home, or are in the solitary arts like writing. (In fact, at AW, the forum is called the Absolute Write Water Cooler.) And beyond social and professional networking sites (at least in my experience) forums such as AW provide us with the professional networking along with the intellectual stimulation and fun that help make a professional life complete. (more…)

“No sir, you cannot ‘test drive’ the merchandise” December 12, 2007

Posted by emsgeiss in Business Issues, Humor & Satire, Uncategorized.
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This is the statement that a very dear friend heard from a store clerk this past Sunday. Not just one store clerk, actually, several store clerks, each at different stores. Now, it’s not what you think, for those of you who are heading down that path. The poor guy was simply trying to make a mundane purchase, and wanted to ensure that it would fit his needs. But being denied the test drives and without finding anything to suit his needs, he remains purchaseless.  Macy’s even failed him, but then again, even Macy’s isn’t Macy’s anymore.

Our dear friend was in search of a murse. For those of you not hip with überchic male accessories, the murse is a male purse, also called a man-bag.  (more…)